My dear friend
I know of no medicine fit to diminish the violent natural inclination you mention; and if I did, I think I should not communicate it to you. Marriage is the proper remedy. It is the most natural State of man, and therefore the state in which you will find solid Happiness.Your reason against entering into it at present appears to be not well founded. The circumstantial advantages you have in view by postponingit, are not only uncertain, but they are small in comparison with the thing itself, the being married and settled. It is the man and woman united that makes the complete human Being, Separate she wants his force of body and strength of reason; he her softness, sensibility and acute discernment. Together they are most likely to succeed in the world. A single man has not nearly the value he would have in that state of union. He is an incomplete animal.He resembles the odd half of a pair of scissors.
If you get a prudent, health wife, your industry in your profession, with her good economy, will be a fortune sufficient.
Your affectionate Friend
By the time you read this you will be 30. At the age of 18 I had so many hopes and dreams about where you'd be, what you'd be doing and with whom you'd spend your life with.
Right now I hope that you have traveled and seen everything you've always wanted to, both in Canada and overseas, and maybe even settled down somewhere in Australia doing some research in the field of biology (genetics).
I hope you're married to the man of your dreams. The man of mine is Gwynn. He is originally from South Africa (another place I wish to visit).
You'll probably have two children of your own – a girl(Michaela Anne) and a boy (name yet to be decided).
If everything goes according to plan you'll be living in Australia in a big house in a small town outside of a big city with a lot of land, a dog, Gwynn and your two beautiful children. Hopefully you have a career in the medical field, maybe doing research in genetics. Gwynn will be a computer programmer and you will be doing alright for yourselves.
However, if things don't go according to plan for you, I wish you all the love, happiness and joy in the world and don't settle for anything less than the best since that is absolutely what you deserve.
Live long, be happy and live life to it's fullest.
Love Sherri "18"
When I read this for the first time since writing it I was floored. Even now having dug this up again another 4 years later I still can't help but think this is really cool.
So much of what I wanted for myself has materialized.
I did travel to a few more places in Canada although I haven't seen everything I'd like to.
I did marry the man of my dreams and yes he still is my one and only.
I've traveled to the UK, South Africa, Australia and New Zealand.
I lived in Australia for nearly 4 years in a big house, in a small suburb, in a major city (close enough).
I had a career in Biology in the field of genetics for 10 years.
I have two lovely kids – both boys (names now decided).
I have not one dog but two dogs. Both yellow labs from Australia.
Gwynn is a computer programmer.
We are doing okay for ourselves.
After writing this I quickly forgot about what I had put in here actually. The things that materialized were all met with quite a bit of resistance (all internal) but I suppose these were things that I really did want. Having never strayed too far from home overseas travel was a huge deal. Having never been away from my family moving to Australia for several years was an incredibly huge decision.
I find it fascinating how the dreams of a young and naive little girl can become a grown woman's reality.
I'm curious if you guys have ever written anything to your future self and how it stacks up to your current reality. If you haven't, will you join me in writing a letter now to yourself in say 10 years from now? It's an interesting little experiment.
In 1994 I wrote a letter. I stuck it in an envelope, put it away and completely forgot about it.
It wasn't until we moved into our new home in 20xx that I found it again. It was addressed to me with explicit instructions not to open until my birthday 20xx. It was now 20xx so I decided to open it. This is what it said:
The day that you see me old and I am already not, have patience and try to understand me …
If I get dirty when eating… if I can not dress… have patience.
Remember the hours I spent teaching it to you.
If, when I speak to you, I repeat the same things thousand and one
times… do not interrupt me… listen to me
When you were small, I had to read to you thousand and one times the same story until you get to sleep…
When I do not want to have a shower, neither shame me nor scold me…
Remember when I had to chase you with thousand excuses I invented, in order that you wanted to bath…
When yousee my ignorance on new technologies… give me the necessary time and not look at me with your
I taught you how to do so many things… to eat good, to dress well… to confront life…
When at some moment I lose the memory or the thread of our
conversation… let me have the necessary time to remember… and if I cannot do it,
do not become nervous… as the most important thing is not my
conversation but surely to be with you and to have you listening to me…
If ever I do not want to eat, do not force me. I know well when I need
to and when not.
When my tired legs do not allow me walk...
give me your hand… the same way I did when you gave your first steps.
And when someday I say to you that I do not want to live any more…
that I want to die… do not get angry… some day you will understand…
Try to understand that my age is not lived but survived.
Some day you will discover that, despite my mistakes, I always wanted
the best thing for you and that I tried to prepare the way for you..
You must not feel sad, angry or impotent for seeing me near you. You
must be next to me, try to understand me and to help me as I did it when
you started living.
Help me to walk… help me to end my way with love and patience. I will
pay you by a smile and by the immense love I have had always for you.
I love you son…